{"id":37876,"date":"2017-05-11T09:13:54","date_gmt":"2017-05-11T01:13:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lifestinymiracles.com\/?p=37876"},"modified":"2017-05-11T12:15:42","modified_gmt":"2017-05-11T04:15:42","slug":"mothers-make-it-work","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lifestinymiracles.com\/2017\/05\/mothers-make-it-work\/","title":{"rendered":"Mothers Make It Work"},"content":{"rendered":"

Love makes all things light…<\/strong><\/p>\n

“While love takes on itself impossible tasks, yet it finds that love lightens all loads. It is the same burden that wings are to a bird, sails are to a ship. Nothing is hard if done for love’s sweet sake. The yoke of love is easy; the yoke of duty is hard. There is all the difference in the world between being drawn by love and being driven by duty. The task may be the same, but love makes everything light, and duty makes everything drudgery<\/em>.” ~ Stanley Jones<\/p>\n

When I don\u2019t measure up\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

I agreed to come on board this blog train with much self-doubt. Among my contemporaries, I feel unqualified to pen a piece on how I made Motherhood \u2018work\u2019. Truth to be told, I often feel inadequate as a Mom. I don\u2019t measure up to other Moms around me. I can\u2019t home-school, I can\u2019t cook well, I can’t play the piano, I can\u2019t sew for nuts. I am quick to anger (my husband can attest to that), my words can be hurtful.  I am neither eloquent, nor virtuous nor slim and pretty. I fuss over the small stuff and make everyone at home tense. If I am ever a full time homemaker, I think my kids would wither under my charge.<\/p>\n

When the mundane multiplies\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

Yet broken and inferior as I am, God has handpicked me to be the Mom to our two precious children. Whether I like it or not, I have to make it work. Daily, I asked for God\u2019s mercies, to empower me to pick up one more diaper, to soothe one more bout of fever, to wake for one more night feed, to brave one more public commute in the rain to send the baby into childcare\u2026to allow my heart to be disappointed time and again by my soon-to-be tween…I am but a vessel and steward of God, given only a short lifetime to mould the hearts and lives of my children. How can I bear such a sacred responsibility on my own shoulders? Mothers have their tipping points too Lord.<\/p>\n

When God sends a village\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

My Husband.<\/p>\n

My husband is the greatest source of encouragement to me. His partnership and devotion to the kids, to the family and to our marriage is the chief reason why this household is still intact. He stands in the gap willingly and never keeps score. He taught me how to love our kids unconditionally. I would never make it as a Mom (or a wife) without his faith in me. <\/p>\n

My Mum.<\/p>\n

I have a somewhat awkward relationship with my mum. Growing up, I begrudged her for not being able to provide my sister and me with a happy childhood. She worked two jobs as a single mum so I seldom get to see her, much less bond. We were never close. Despite that, after I became a Mom myself, she was the one who would come to my \u2018rescue\u2019. She was there when I delivered my still-borns; she was there when we had maid woes. Whenever there was a crisis, she came and showed support, in ways big and small. Her presence in the midst of the storms comforts me. <\/p>\n

My Bosses and Colleagues.<\/p>\n

I was blessed to have met two understanding bosses in the past decade where I was granted flexi part-time work arrangement. Being home in the afternoons did much good to my daughter\u2019s early years. I also count it a bonus to have a small handful of caring, jovial colleagues to lunch and commiserate with.<\/p>\n

My Neighbours.<\/p>\n

As the Chinese saying goes, ‘Good neighbours are closer than far-away relatives’. We have been blessed to meet some good neighbours living in the same estate. The kids play together, and the adults meet for fellowship on special occasions. On days when we were occupied, they would offer to bring Dana out for play dates and even help to walk Dana to school. We are also beneficiaries of yummy home-cooked meals. When life hits us hard, simply being in the company of good people restores hope. <\/p>\n

Friends of Faith.<\/p>\n

When we were grieving for our child losses, our world crashed. Our cell members and Christian friends rallied around us. They prayed with us and cried with us. They gave us space to heal and gently supported us as we come to terms with the (cruel) will of God. Death wasn\u2019t taboo to them; in fact, they reminded us of the blessed assurance that one day, we would meet our babies who had gone before us.<\/p>\n

My Sister (and Brother-in-law).<\/p>\n

My sister loves (and pampers) my kids like her own. During my 3 months\u2019 bed rest in the hospital, she brought fresh flowers to cheer me up weekly. She acted as my proxy to buy a birthday gift for my husband when I was confined to the hospital. My sister and her husband’s generosity and love towards my family humble me. We\u2019ve since appointed them legal guardians of our kids in our will.<\/p>\n

Friends Through Blogging.<\/p>\n

God has been kind to send very trustworthy friends along my way since I started the blog, parent blogger friends and PR agency friends, to be specific. Some were there rejoicing with us the night we welcomed Buddy home, others celebrated other milestones with us. In sharing our parenting struggles and victories, we grew closer and became family friends. I have grown to appreciate the support from this online community so very much. Our kids hit off well too.  This brings me immense joy.<\/p>\n

My Kids.<\/p>\n

I don’t know what I did to deserve these two beautiful children from God. I feel ashamed that I haven\u2019t been a good-enough Mom and I haven\u2019t been as patient with them as I should. But kids have such immense propensity to forgive. No matter how many times their Mom has faltered, they will still snuggle up next to me and tell me, \u201cMommy I love you\u201d.<\/p>\n